MIA fer days..bit im back!!♥:)

Aiyo..sooooooooooooo long neva post lerx..cum back so many tag..hahas..thnx fer the tags..been busy lately..so many things to deal with..dad's back:)..the common test cumin..n the last 2 days busy with the sports days eveny..OMG!!..Hahas..but it was all ok i guess..especially the sports day events..took part in 4 events..all 3 long distance...mi leg so freakin pain!!!!BUT long distance event rocks!!!! I ran 1.5km,3km,4 by 400 n 4 by 100..wanted to run 4oom..but sec 2 girls..less than 3 join(plus mie)..so cancel lerx:(..anyway..i gt in 1st of all sec2 girls 4 1.5km!!!! n 2nd 4 all sec 2 girls 4 3km!!!!..I was lyk so damn happy lahx..xD..was hopin to at least get a bronze for the 4 by 4oo..:(..but didn't manage to get it..was dissappointed..hais..nvm:)..there's alwys a nx yearxD..anyway..bad news..vickki n mr sc broke..hais..i jus simply dun understand boys..y r most of them lyk tat..after toyin with u..they jus dump u away..vickki.. i guess u understood hw i felt..dun b too upset..as i told u..mayb..he's not the rite wan..or mayb..its not the rite time..there r lots of other maybs..but tats the way things r..some of us learn it light n easy..while others,lyk us..learn it the harsher way..tats the harsh reality of life..sometimes u jus wish..its a bad dream..wen u wake up..u'll find tat everythin will b back 2 the way it was..but it isn't..tis is the truth..tis is wats happenin nw..n we hav to accept it..it will take time..u will hurt inside..but gif it time..it may take days..wks..or mayb months..but it'll get better..i promise.."Love cums n goes..but friendship stays.."always remember..tat there r always frens who'll b there 4 u..n i'll alwys b there 4 u..kayys..we r best frens 4eva!:)..ok..gotta go..cya later.. ps:Thnx fer the tags again..:)

A BIG THANK U!!!!!!!! fer the things tat happen the few days

*Joey mei♥* THnx so much fer the post...U r a GREAT FREN..ONE OF THE BEST:)..Dun worry..i'll b fine..n i'll always b here fer u toos...always..i promise(:THNX FER EVERYTHIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!N dun cry..cry lerx..not pretty anymores:P..hahas..~♥*BeSt FRenS 4EVa*♥~!!!!!!! luv3♥ u!!:P *Jieyi♥* Didn't manage to thank u properly fer the tag..A BIG THNX TO U TOO!!! Thnx fer everythin..♥Lurves u!!:P *YJ de Mr Boyfriend* Thnx fer all the encouragements!!! I appreciate it!! Dun worry..i'll b ok:)..~THNX SO MUCH~!!!! *YJ nuEr♥* Thnx fer everythin nuEr..thnx fer bein there fer mie gd or bad:)..love u♥!! A BIG THNX TO U!!!!!!!!!!!!! *Alex de GaY ParTner* Thnx fer everythin..the encouragements n all..thnx..~THNX SO MUCH~!! *JiE♥* Thnx fer everythin jiE..thnx fer the hugs n cheer ups..♥LoVe u aLwaYs!!:) *GaN-MeI♥* THnx fer everythin..U R THE BEST!!!! THNX ALOT!!!!!!:) *THe Others♥* ~~~♥♥♥♥THNX SO MUCH GUYS>I lOVE U ALL!!!!♥♥♥~~~

Back home..

First time left home so long..the feelin wen i stepped into the empty house..mixed emotions..walkin round the house as if its the first time i stepped into it..memories flood back as i walked into each rm....scenes of mi happy family..playin,laughin happily..stabbed into mi heart..i blinked those tears away..walked in my rm..close the door..sat in 1 corner..n started it..tears flowed out uncontrollably..i feel so alone..in tis big empty house..1 by 1..all mi love ones hav left..he's left..nw dad..i've been prayin so hard these days..so hard..i wan him back so much..he cant jus abandon as..he cant..he wun't..i jus noe it..he promised..i noe it..3hearts remember..he promised..i sat there..cryin..till i heard the house door opened..den close..i went out..saw little samy layin in his bed..fell asleep..mus b tired out..walked into the livin rm..n switched on the tv..mum came out frm her rm..saw mie..but said nth.there's nth much to sae to each other..we had a quiet dinner..he wun b cumin back..she den said quietly..he will..i answered....she lost it..he wun,she screamed..he will..i shouted back..tears streaked down..i noe he will..he promised..she stood starin..eyes glistenin with tears..i noe tat she believe he will return..but y wun she jus say it..she walked back into the rm n closed the door..i noe wad it meant..she believed..she still loved him..n he still loved her..n she knew..nw here i am tellin u tis,dad..we r all hopin,wisihin,prayin,believin n noe tat u'll b back..she's forgif u..she nids u..all of us nid u..cum back soon..we'll b waitin........as 4 todae..i jus would lyk 2 thk all mi frens 4 all the encouragement todae..dun worry..i'll b fine..:)..reallie..thnx 4 everythin!! love u all veri much:)

I wan u back..

Came back frm church not long ago..eyes all red frm the constant sobbin..i cant help it..was sittin behind a father n daughter in church..she was bout 5yrs old only..was veri playful..she kept playin with her father..was not payin attention to the speaker..but her father was..she was sittin on his lap but fiddlin with everythin she found interestin..daddy's fingers,his collar..everythin..daddy didn't mind..cuddled her close to him..protectively..i jus couldn't help it..tears jus started to swell..i clutched the necklcae daddy gave mi 4 my 10th b'dae..it has 3hearts..he saes it meant 3 promises 2 mi..i've used up 2..on the veri dae he gave mi..i told him i wanted to use up 1..i want him to love mi 4ever..he smiled at mi n said 4ever he will..2nd promise was made months later..wen he jus quarrelled with mummy..i was afraid..n was cryin..he carried mi in his arms..n told mi it will b ok..he promised..4yrs has passed..here i am wishin..prayin with all mi heart..his 3rd promise...tat he'll cum back to mi..to hold mi in his arms..to tell mi it'll b ok..he promised.. I wan him back..i wan to b in his arms..i wan to hear him tell mie he love mie..i wan 2 hear him tel mie everythin is goin 2 b ok..he promised..he promised..he cant go back on his words..i nid him..i love him so much..he nids to cum back..pls cum back..i cant take it anymore..daddy..where r u..havin to deal with the pain of losin u alone..its unbearable..he's gone..nw u've left mie too...im prayin hard..pls cum back..i miss u so much..there's jus so much things in mi..but no one to tel to..i nid u..i wan u to cum back to mie..u promised..u promised..

Breakin down..

A big fight..dad's gone..mum's cryin..the house seems so less..n empty..dad..pls cum back..mum nids u..little samy nids u..i nid u..i noe mum can b unreasonable..but..she luvs u..mum's been real fired up since you left..moody..i noe she didn't mean the words she said the other day..so pls cum back..i want u 2 come back..i nid u..i noe i've not been a perfect daughter..i noe u've loved mi more than little samy..tats y i love u more than mummy too.. Ever since u left..i went to kor house to stay..little samy's takin care of mum..he's doin a gd job..i was afraid if i stayed anymore at home..i might lose mi temper with mummy..i hate her 4 screamin at u..i hate her 4 makin u go away..i hate her 4 makin our family fall apart..pls cum back ..n i promise u i'll b gd n wun quarrel with mum..i've been cryin for 2 days..cus i missed u...i hav no more energy 2 deal with this..y wun u at least corr back 2 tel us u r fine..i nid u..i reallie nid u... I'm feelin so much pain..mi eyes has swelled of cryin..yet i cant find edmund kor to say..he has someone he lyks already...n i shouldn't rely on him anymore...all tis yrs i've gotten use to relyin on him..the first thin tat happens is him i'll confide him..but now i cant..not anymore..there's no one left to lean on..but myself..but..i'm breakin down soon..i cant take it anymores..teardrops jus keep rollin down mi cheeks..bcus of the weight i hav to carry alone..i'm not strong enuff..i jus cant take it anymore..not anymore..

Feelin Lousy..

Came back at 7.45 todae...kana scolded..again by mum..already not first time lorrx..i duno wad the hell is wrong with her..everyday also scold..both mi n bro..tats y i hate goin home..everytime ask wads wrong with us..she den gt problem lehx!!!!!!!!!!!! Everythin also wan scold!!!!!!!!!!! Listen 2 her scold damn shuang mehx..cant stand her!!!!!!!!!!!!!! How i hate stayin at home..sayin everythin she do is 4 us..studies is so impt..where gt ppl everytime of the day study de..she go try lahx!! Only use mouth lorrx she!!!! Hate tokin 2 her..i tink i rather tok 2 the wall den tok 2 her!! In the end also will quarrel de..every conversation we make will end with quarrels n shoutin..i cant stand hearin her voice..everythin also she rite..the whole world is wrong..a home is not a home 2 mie..is jus an empty place..4 mie 2 sleep in..lyk tat i rather not hav a home..i rather stay in sch..at least gt frens,gt laughter n fun..gt ppl hu understand mie..at home lehx..shout ,fight,quarrel..tis ban tat ban..hp also anytime also can confiscate..4 no reason..its not even a home..i dun even belong there..dun tok bout tis lerx..no mood..todae in sku..lit lesson..tat cher..got sore throat lehx!!hahas..hu ask her alwys shout 4 nth..gd 4 her..:P..den art..slacked the whole lesson..hahas..nth 2 do..basically nth much happened in sch..;p hahas..oh..den todae stay back play bball with nicole,adeline n the boys..quite fun..veri long nvr play lerx..so fun..den bout 7 den leave sku..i den dunwan so early go home lehx!!..i 7 den leave sku..but gt ppl pei mi walk bustop n home(gd rites:P)..tats all 4 todae!! mum's scoldin already..hais..gtg..

Hies..(gloom*)..hais..duno todae wads wrong..cum to sku mood not veri gd..on short fuse..i so duno wads wrong todae..its lyk..anybody also wan scold..lyk theres somethin boilin in mie..lyk i can jus feel the heat risin in mie..aggrah..so fraustratin..theres lyk so many things in me..but i duno wad is it..i duno hw 2 say..im jus feelin so lousy..but i cant do anythin bout it..jus burst out..4 example todae..gan mei n jie tis mornin..make mi hair..make until the whole thin so messy..normally..i wun get so angry..but i duno y todae i jus lashed out on them..i hav nvr felt so angry inside mi b4..anywys SORWIE JIE n GAN MEI..bad mood todaes..:P..i dun even noe wad im angry about..im jus..angry..den..oh ya todae play volleyball with wei ling mummy de class..veri fun at first only 2n7 playin den ting fang jie n mi join in..den edmund..den mr boyfriend den alot of upper sect(i duno wan:P) den came mr sc n mr ss join in lorrx..den the whole team lyk damn big..damn fun lahx..hahas..hope can play again..veri fun!!!!!!!!! den tat stupid mr ss kept callin mi name..im used to his callin lerx lorrx..but todae..i jus kinda got REALLIE irritated by tat idiot..tat i shot back at him..i cant believe i did tat..hais..i've nvr..let such a thin got on mi nerve b4..i mean i hav exploded b4 ..but not 4 such small thins..den todae once step into house kana scolded by mum of bill burst lorrx!!!!!!!!! so irritatin!!!!!!!!!!! tats all she can do..nag..hais dun care her lahx!!!!!!!!!..she dun even understand mie..even mi frens noe mi better den her..i wish he was here with mie..or rather i wish i can have back the feelin of bein loved again..i wan it back..i reallie wan it back so much..the feelin of someone hu noes u well..hu cares 4 u..hu loves u jus 4 u..i wan it back..

Rainy Monday..(:D)

Ellos...todae...rainy day sia..hais..but todae day considered ok lahx..todae first period geog..cher nvr cum lehx!!!!!!!!!! Veri lucky cher nvr cum lehx..gif alot ppl time do finish undone hw..:P..i managed to do mi hist n maths hw finish in tat period..so heng..:P..den after tat period..maths..boriiiiin...i wasn't even payin attention..hahax..:P..i only noe it as pourin n it was damn cold..den recess lerx..den after it..chi period flew pass..den hist..cher was angry at our sittin arrangement..it was so messy..it reallie was..so she rearranged it fortunately fer her lesson only..fortunately again i wasn't wan of those hu nided to change place..=P..den the lesson went on..fer another 15mins den riiiiiiiiiing the bell went..i was jus about 2 put mie head on the table n drift 2 mi beauty sleep..wen someone frm the window corr mie..hais..mi beauty sleep..sob*...i turn around to c daniel n his frens..surprise 2 c him..so long he nvr corr on mi lerx..sms only lahx..den he tell mi his class de gort someone lyk mie..den he ask mie 2 accept the person..den i say i nvr even c the person b4 accept wad..hais..so he sae tmr let mie c..angeline n yj nu-er also tel mi gort ppl lyk mie..hais..another 3..i mean it is reallie nice to hear someone lyks u..but as it piles up n becomes a long queue of ppl..it starts 2 be alittle of a drag..n bore..hais..but its ok..guess im used 2 it..hahas..no lahx..gan-mei is den the pretty wan lorrx..horrx..hahas..vickki also..:p heard vickki todae happy again lahx(tokin 2 her on fone nwxD)..her mr SC walk her 2 LRT again..he earn another point..:P..im soooo envious!!!!!!!!! lyk real..hahas..abit sot already...todae walk in the rain..cus nobody brin umbrella..hahas..walk with nicole,gan-mei.alex,gay partner,ee lin n jie..veri funny..ee lin,nicole,mi n helina all got file cover our head..while the rest walk in the rain..den nicole say she got umbrella..but it wa spoilt by alex the powerful butt..hahas..xD..apperently..it was alex whom sat on it causin the handle to break into 2..so eelin n xinyi shared the umbrella..holdin the umbrella by the broken handle..hahas..they hold so high..it was quite a comical sight...we played along the way..xD..den gan-mei n jie came mi house..they help send some pics to mi comp n help mi duty up mi blog..though dosn't lyk much diff:p..hahas..jus jk..still A BIG THANK YOU 2 THEM!!!!!!!!!!!!..CLAP*CLAP*..den after tat send them to the bustop take bus home..hahas..we played there lyk some kindergarden kids lorrx..hahas..so fun!anyway..tats it fer todae..tmr gt trainin n haven do hw!!!!!!!! nid to do lerx!!!!!!!!

short day>borrin..

yesterday come back late den ganna scoldin frm mi mum..:(...she now adays veri grumpy lorrx....:(..nw everyday also nag n scold 4 nth..every little thin also wann scold..ppl cum home late lerx so tired..she still wan nag..duno wad's her problem lorrx..dun lyk stay at home!!!! i wish can stay in sku..if only sku can stay de..hais..i rellie dun nid her scoldin mie rite now..im jus so fraustrated..n im gonna burst soon...i reallie dun nid tis now.. i tot i was strong..its been so long..i tot i could forget him..but i somehow i jus cant..everyday..its jus the same..or shod i say its worst..it jus wasn't tat easy to put aside mi feelins 4 him..it's jus reallie hard to deal with tis..but im doin it...jus to get tru each day..hais..i guess i still lyk him bahx..oh u noe yesterdy..mr SS wait 4 mi lehx..wanted to song wo hui jia..he veri scary!!!!!i den dun wan he song wo hui jia..lucky gt taufiq help mi..=)..yay! saved!!..he kept smsin mi tellin mi mr SS is downstairs n all..so tat i wun come downstairs or at least cum down unprepared but he fortunately..i went home late so he left first!!yay!!!anyway..lets not tok bout tis.u noe todae the maths test postpone again..hahas..cant believe it,,last week postpone until nw..hahas..we damn pro lehx..change to tmr..mus study hard 4 it..im a gd girl;>hahas..den todae art..tok to vickki almost the whole lesson..xD..bout her n mr SC..tat mr SC also very wan kind lorrx..hais..duno wad is he doin lorrx..cant initiate lehx he..aiya..dunwan tok bout him lerx..anyway mi n sis decided to b gd mummies n decide 2 fang guo yj nu er n mr boyfren..they gd lahx..lucky 4 them..:>.. but nx time round..not tat easy lerx..xD..hahas..oh..n sis sorwie canot wait 4 u again todae..cus mi mum dun allow mi stay..=<>..pray tat i'll b able 2 persuade them n hope our class can take part as a whole..2E5ROCKSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

=)very fun-volleyball!!!!

halos!:p i luv fri!!!!!!! lessons veri short!!!!!!! end sku at 12.35!!!!!!! todae pe lesson damn fun lahx!!!! volleyball... hahas.. paired with mi vickki..xD i tink we make a gd pair!!!!!!!!!! play with her always damn fun de lorrx..xP den after sku... stay back with xiao xin yi,eelin n helina jie.. we were bored... so we go borrow pe rm key frm miss neo.. to take 1 ball play.. VOLLEYBALL!!!! YAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Mi,helina jie n xiao xin yi play at the empty space near the cca tower.. den e2 ppl saw us.. hahas... they c us play..den kep ask mi "weird" ques.. bout "him"..he also dere..:p hahas..nvr ans them..:p dunwan ans lahx.. afterall we also over lerx mahx..:) so 4get it..:) hahas.. den weiling ask mi i lyk her rite.. hahas..xD.. told her i love her!!!!!! reallie horrx!!!!!!!! love u weiling!!!!!!!!!xD we play half way.. den mr rain came drizzlin..:( hai yo!!!! den we go upstairs hall play.. very fun n funi!!!!!!! we kep tryin to kep the ball in the air.. but canot..its veri funny!!!!!!! we got to kep runnin everywhere 2 get the ball..hahahas!!!! anyway..we stop soon.. cus veri tired.. den helina jie wan go home lerx.. so off we went.. sorwie canot pei u,yj nu er..:( nx tym kays!!!!!!!!=) n vickki too!!!!!! sorwie canot wait 4 u!!!!!!!!!!!! sorwie!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! so went compass with xiao xin yi to take bus.. but ended up eatin ice cream n walkin in compass point!!!=P den we met xiao xiao xin yi!!!!!!!!!!! its her b'dae todae!!!!!!!!!!!!! i didn't noe!!!!!!!!!!!!!! sorwie!!!!!!!!!! n HAPPY B'DAE xiao xiao xin yi!!!!!!!!!!! she even gave us 2 sweets 4 her b'dae.. she's sooooo sweet!!!!!!!!!!!!=) hahas... anyway.. mr bf still owe mi nu er 2 hugs!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! u todae nvr gif!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i feel lyk loan shark lehx.. hahas..chasin him 4 hugs 4 mi nu er!!!!!!!!! but wad do loan sharks do wen the person nvr pay wad they owe???? they increase the amount rites!!!!!!! tats wad i'll do..but i'll increase the time of hw long u hug mi nu er!!! todae 3sec lerx.. nx mon.. if still dun hug... 5sec ler lehx... orh hor...mus hug horrx,mr bf!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i'll chase u on mon again!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! anyway yar..jus came back frm tuition.. actualli.. nt reallie jus larx.. i actuali jus spend 45mins on the phone with vickki.. she happy larx.. her mr sc gt improvement..=) veri happy 4 her..:) jiayous vickki!!!!!!!xD dun make the same mistake as i did.. dun feel the pain den realise ur mistake.. by tat tym its already too late... wen its too late.. u've got to deal with the pain of losin him.. but hav to hav tat smile hung on ur face.. while hurtin each day... u jus try 4gettin him.. but u jus cant... but tats not the worst.. the worst is seein each other everyday.. but not bein able to be 2gether.. treasure him..

Tired..hais..

Todae trainin so damn tired lehx!!!!!!!!!!! but todae sec 4 senior all cum lehx.. c them play abit funni..:p cus..they rusty lerx..den keep missin shots.. hahas..but all the same..they r the best seniors!!!!! N tat ee lin horrx.. todae nvr go trainin.. she go 4 her prefect meetin..on the student exchange thing..i tink she gd lorrx.. leave mi behind.. hahas..no lahx.. she lucky nvr go.. coach make us run 10 rounds lehx!!!!!!!! even though short circuit.. still veri tirin lehx!!!!! but we help ourself to discount.. hehes:p so we run 8 rounds only..:p shhhhhhhh...xD finally tat exhaustin trainin over lerx... i feel so honoured!!!!!xD cus gt 4 pretty ladies waitin 4 mie.. hahas...yj nu er,eelin n gan jie n vickki.. but vickki was rush 4 tym.. so mi n gan jie wlk her out first.. sway sway..rain lehx!!!!!! so we sent her 2 a certain distance den made a dash 4 it.. we dance in the run lehx!!!!=P hahas..lolz.. yj nu er,her mr boyfriend n ee lin were sitin in the canteen.. we ate while waitin 4 rain rain 2 go away.. then we tok bout mr santa claus..=D he damn bad lehx.. nvr send vickki back.. he failed the test.. no hope lahx he... hais... den mr boyfren make a bet with us say tis rain wun stop so fast de.. it will continue 4 a period of time.. den i sae.. if he win.. he nid gif mi yj nu er 1 hug.. if he lose den 2 hugs..xD hahas..unfortunately 4 him.. the rain soon stop.. orh hor:>..mr boyfren..u owe mi nu er 2 hugs!!!!!!!xD mus gif her!!!! mummy's shoutin!!!! n bsides im..damn tired lerx.. if dun sleep soon..sure gt panda eyes tmr!!!=P nvm..i'll get mr boyfren tmr!!!:> gif u the news tmr!!!:P

Todae de day lyk end veri fast..Both periods i didn't lyk,maths n sci...both the chers didn't come!!..OMG its unbelievable!!!To think i was gettin panicky wen it was nearin sci period..cux didn't learn the test..so lucky.. But the day very borinnn n quiet..cy kor not here..lyk so quiet lorrx.. hais...ok..enuff of tis...anyway..after sku..eelin,gan jie,mi,alex n edmund went hougang mall..eelin wanted to buy somethin 4 her aunt..so we pei her..such gd frens we r..xD..hahaz..actuli gan jie n i had nothin to do anywa..n both the boys jus wanted to tag along 4 fun....we jus had lunch,bought to gift n splited..gan jie,alex n mie..went home the same way..as we were on the way out..we saw.."him" outside of hougang mall..with his fren..i guess it was a natural response wen i felt a certain amount of pain..but..well..it soon faded..as i reminded miself..its been over so long..we stayed around 4 awhile as alex did his part with "flirtin" with them..afterall he said tat he's interested in guys..xD..Den we left 4 home..spent the day with mi comp n on the phone with vickki..hahaz..lets jus say its a daily routine with vickki on the fone..we chatted almost the whole afternoon n only got off the phone after i got an earful frm mi maid..:D..hahax.. anyway yar..tats it 4 the day..quite a borinn day..k lahx..tmr still got trainin..catch up later..